Not your standard issue late twenty-something's blog.

Friday, March 04, 2005

Every single one of us the devil inside

I'm both exhausted and filled with a quiet rage. A freelance chick in my office helps fill in the gaps three days a week while we interview folk for currently empty positions. She's a friend of my boss and they're peers career-wise but she fancies herself my boss as well and does her best to confuse issues under the guise of being "helpful."

Example A: Yesterday's computer issue.

Kath (entering boss's office where Lisa hovers, a loud bird with big hair): Hey, Michael, I-
Lisa: My computer -
Kath (shooting menancing look): Yes?
Lisa: Sorry.
Michael (staring dejectedly at screen, throwing hands in air): What have they done?!
Kath: I just talked to the Help Desk. Let's call them together.
Michael: No, I just need to know-
Lisa: I can't get on my computer either.
Kath (menancing look to Lisa): Michael, I know. I just talked to them but rather than be the go-between, I thought it might be best -
Michael: (pressing keys with wild fury) I don't want to talk to them. I need to send this email.
Lisa: I can't get on my computer.
Kath: I know. I was getting Michael access to Tony's files which are on the computer you're using. (in the silence of my heart: dumb cuntbitch)
Michael: Why do I have two Microsoft outlooks?
Kath: Tony's account is closed so they're simply transferring everything to you.
Michael: Well, they better open it back up.
Lisa: He only needs Tony's Word files, Katherine.
Kath: (in the silence of my heart: you condescending whore. your huge hair resembles Cher's in video hit "If I Could Turn Back Time," complete with sailors and crotchless leotard) I know.
Michael: You know what? I really just need to send this email.
Kath: Well, when you're done, let me know. And we'll call the Help Desk from your phone. It'll be most efficient.
Michael: I don't want to talk to them. I want to know what's going on with my computer.
Lisa: You know what? I'll call them.
Michael: Yes, you call them, Lisa. She (pointing to Kath with hurry) doesn't have to do anything.


Blogger Gabe said...

how 'bout a job for ol' chubby?

3:25 PM


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