I got nothin.

I'm overcaffeinated.
I'm down to the last pistachios in the jar . . you know, the ones you can't crack. In turn, I have ruined several of my already short nails in the attempt to eat said nuts.
I must buy a strapless bra tonight. I hate strapless bras. They're the most worthless invention ever. They fall down. They're not supportive. But I don't want to be the maid of honor at my sister's wedding this weekend and have unfettered boobs.
"Kad, dere's nuddin worse dan boobs before dinner" (direct pre-Prom quote)
Point being, at least if I wear a strapless bra I can't be accused of not trying to fetter my boobs.
I have farmer's tan on my left arm. Coincidentally, I had farmer's tan on both arms at my brother's wedding. Perhaps it's a sign of good things to come. Farmer's tan on one arm equals shotgun wedding. Both equals held out for marriage. Ugh. Tim, you can come up with something better, I'm sure.