Things that do and don't suck.

Things I do not believe in or things I believe are unacceptable or unlikely or things I hate:

musicals
the supposed comedic stylings of the fat one
umbrellas (j/j: sorry, i took yours by accident)
actors as genuine, good-hearted people
comics as genuine, good-hearted people
musical theater actor's straightness
poodle haircuts
not flossing
not showering
excessive backhair
smoking pot as a supergood thing for anyone
people who are unaware of their surroundings, like the dude who walked right into my darts game at Billymarks while chatting on his cellphone.
people who charge the elevator or subway w/o waiting for others to get off
people who don't talk. unless they're genuinely mute.
people who can't take a joke.
people who are PC
people who wrinkle their noses at things i hold dear but get horribly offended if i poo poo something they like (like my co-worker who wrinkled her nose at therapy and told our entire office how horrified she was that her exbf was on anti-depressants)
people who only drink at expensive bars
people who willingly get up early and don't nap later
cats
guys who use IM conversation or texting as a substitute for calling
umbrella drinks (see, it all comes back to umbrellas)

things that are important or i believe in or i think are awesome:

taking a dump at home when no one's there
keeping the same movie in your DVD player for weeks so you can have it on in the background while you're cooking, i.e. Best in Show or Anchorman or Old School. Esp Old School.
underwire bras
thong underwear
boyshorts
dive bars
cheap beer
good beer and seafood
red wine and a cigarette
italian food
sushi
pizza
a good turkey and swiss sammich
coffee. and more coffee.
the lazy brunch. and if it's at a place called sabrina's, so much the better
naps
kielbasa
lip balm. the kind in the blue circle tub.
jergen's tanning moisturizing lotion
dogs
oatmeal, the 5-minute kind
gravy
(you can put gravy on oatmeal. i don't recommend it)
arrested development
jason bateman
a long shower
a good pair of sneakers
the morning screw
the afternoon screw
mintyfresh breath
kathleen turner's voice

there's more but i'm hungry.